We do our best thinking when we are not thinking. It’s true. When we’re clogged up with our personal thinking, that keeps our innate wisdom from coming through. When we clear out our thoughts, that’s when we can hear our wisdom more clearly.
For example: Have you ever misplaced something, like your keys, and couldn’t find them when you searched for them? But, when you stopped searching for them (thinking about it) and moved on to doing something else (not thinking about it) it came to your mind where your missing item was?
The same thing is true when we think about other things. Maybe you’re trying to figure out what to do about something, how to handle a certain situation, or dealing with tough emotions, when we clear out our personal thinking (stop thinking about it) the answers will come from within us. It’s pretty simple when we don’t over complicate it.
UPDATE – Hi Everyone, even though the summer group has closed, I’m keeping this post up to welcome interest in starting another group. If you are interested in being a member of a future group, please email me. Thank you!
I’m not trying to rush the summer, but I just realized the impact of it being the middle of July already! Which means, September, aka Back-to-School time, is right around the corner (I love school and office supplies, so back-to-school time is one of my favorite seasons of the year😄). This led to another realization for me, as the remaining weeks of summer are used to prepare for the upcoming school year, we can also use them to strengthen and enhance our lives internally as well. Maybe you have a goal you wanted to achieve by now and have not yet. Maybe you’re feeling stuck, personally, professionally, or relationally, and you’re wondering how you can get past the issue. Maybe you’re not feeling like your best self and you are ready to shine even brighter.
If that’s you, or maybe someone you know, I’m running a 5-week coaching group for women who are ready to get unstuck, make more progress, and break through limits. We’ll meet by conference call each Saturday morning in August. We’ll explore the inside-out nature of life, where our experiences really come from, clarify what we want for our lives, get honest about what’s holding us back, and gain insight for moving forward. I’m holding consultation sessions now for perspective group members. If this speaks to you, if you want to get unstuck in some area in your life, or even if you’d prefer individual sessions, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org for more information and to schedule your consultation. Let’s finish the summer off stronger together!
Today is noted as the International Day of Happiness. I’m all for celebrating happiness, and at the same time helping people to understand where our happiness comes from. We were born happy. There is nothing outside of us that can make us happy. We don’t have to search for it. It just doesn’t work that way, because our feelings only come from our thinking.
I started doing Crossfit about a month ago. There’s a lot of weightlifting, and I’ve been trying to learn all of the movements as best I can so I don’t get injured. So, I decided to not add any weight to the barbell until I get the formations right. Last week one WOD (workout of the day) was mostly deadlifts. To do a proper deadlift your back has to be straight as you bend. Well, I was having difficulty keeping my back straight while reaching and picking up my bare barbell. Then one of my fellow athletes mentioned that if I added weight to my bar it would raise the bar up and make it easier to reach. So, I added some weights, and sure enough it was easier for me to do a deadlift. Did you catch that!! Adding the weights helped me! Avoiding the weights was holding me back from progress!
Many times we may avoid weighted, tough, or difficult situations in our lives because we think they hurt us, or worse, that we won’t succeed. But, it’s the pressure that we face, not avoid, that helps us to grow and reach new levels (just like how high temperatures & pressure make diamonds). If we don’t try, we’ll never know what we’re capable of.
My son and youngest daughter were sitting down to breakfast today and my daughter announced that she didn’t want to sit next to him. So, a little squabble ensued and he moved one seat down. The squabble continued and suddenly my son starts crying in pain because when his sister pushed the chair in between them it smashed his finger. But, less than five minutes later, the tears were gone and their squabble was replaced with laughter. How could things have changed so quickly? How did he go from pain to joy? It’s the power of thought.
Our feelings and behavior come from our thoughts. No where else. Always. It really is that simple. That’s the nature of our human experience. Sometimes we just make it harder than it really is. We constantly have thoughts. Just as the waves come and go, so do our thoughts. As my kids showed me this morning, when we don’t hold on to our thoughts they leave and then our feelings and behaviors change.
There was nothing that my son had to do to feel better. As soon as his thoughts changed, he felt better. It’s the same for all of us. We don’t have to try to get or strive after wellbeing, peace, and happiness. It just doesn’t work that way. Our true nature is wellbeing, peace, and happiness. Sometimes our thoughts cover that up, just like the clouds sometimes cover the sun. But, the sun is still there. It’s only our thoughts that create our experiences.
I took my youngest daughter for a “drive” in her jeep. She turned on the radio and cruised down the block. Then suddenly she stopped, got out of the jeep, and took a dance break. In addition to it being extremely adorable, it reminded me of the importance of being flexible in the moment. When we are too attached, and resistant to change, it’s easy to ignore those moments and miss what God is trying to show or teach us. If I had made my daughter stay in her jeep instead, I would have missed a chance to help her learn to feel confident in her decision making, and I would have missed the joy of seeing her dance so freely in the moment. My daughter would have missed a teachable moment in self love, trust, and in knowing that she is perfect just the way she is: someone who loves to dance no matter where she is or who’s watching.
I wish you and your family a very Happy Thanksgiving. May it be filled with love, joy, and peace.
When I think about all that I am thankful for, the support and encouragement that I receive from my community, and the privilege to journey with and support my clients, are definitely at the top of my list. Thank you with all of my heart!
This picture, taken by my cousin on a trip to Assisi, Italy, captured my attention instantly. Look at it closely. What do you see?
I see a tree, growing while surrounded by concrete and some dark spaces. I’m not an agriculturist, and I definitely do not have a green thumb, but I do know that this environment is not what’s best for plant-life to grow. Yet, somehow it did and still does. It’s the same thing for us humans. Sometimes we may find ourselves in circumstances, situations, and environments that are not ideal for our growth. The truth of the matter is that our worth and potential are not defined or determined by our circumstances and situations. It doesn’t matter where we come from, where we are now, or what we’ve done in our past. Unfortunately, there are many messages in the atmosphere that try to convince us otherwise all of the time. But, we can choose what messages we listen to. The tree in the picture didn’t listen to the concrete and darkness telling it that it couldn’t grow. Somehow it defied those messages. We can do the same. If you look at the picture more closely, you’ll see that the tree grew towards the light. It found and gravitated to what it needed to support its growth. Where is the light in your life that you can gravitate to for support in your growth and to enhance your potential?