Category Archives: General


With opportunities to express kindness so abound, it makes sense, to me, to ask how come there is so much unkindness and negativity in the world. Here’s what I’m seeing and understanding more for myself: when we feel like being kind and when we do not feel like being kind are not connected to our experiences (other people’s behavior, situations, circumstances, even our opinions if someone deserves kindness, etc.). The feeling of kindness ebbs and flows, like all feelings do. It’s not caused by anything external.

As a parent, I used to think that my children’s behavior caused me to feel a certain way, that their misbehavior = me being upset and showing that to them. Basically, I thought that if they misbehaved then that caused me to be unkind. One morning, almost a year ago, my son would not get up on time for school. In fact, he didn’t wake up until it was time for us to leave. I had been trying to wake him up for more than 40 minutes, while also trying to help my other 3 kids get ready for school too. I yelled and fussed at him badly. There was no kindness in that moment.

Tearfully we made it out the door and I walked them to school late (again). On my walk back home I got an insight, and I realized that my son could have acted the same way and went to school experiencing his mother’s love instead of experiencing his mother’s wrath. In that moment I saw very clearly that there was absolutely no causal relationship between my son’s actions and my feelings. None at all. How we experience everything, including kindness, is inside-out.

Love & blessings,

Feeling Blessed In A Hurricane

Good morning everyone. I’ve been up at 4:30am for the past 3 days, not because of Hurricane Irma, but for the first weekend of Clarity Mentor Training and my second year with Clarity Coach Training. It’s happening in London, so I’m live streaming from Florida. I am so excited for this next 10 month journey. We started with a listening exercise where we had to share why we are on the course and what have we come for. I shared that since I was a child I’ve sung the song, “What a Friend We Have in Jesus,” but now I really understand the meaning of the line that says, “what needless pain we bear, all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.” Then one of my exercise partners and I sung the line together. It was a beautiful moment.

How do we bear needless pain? I’m glad you asked. All of the fear, anxiety, worry, insecurity, etc. that is needless pain we bear. Let me explain. Right now I’m hunkered down to ride out hurricane Irma and I’m feeling blessed. The reason for that is that our felt experience only comes from the energy of Thought. Nothing outside of thought can make us feel anything. We only feel what comes through our thought system. That’s the way the mind works. We are connected to the Wisdom and Intelligence behind life and that is where our security, our wellbeing, our happiness, our peace comes from. It’s already inside us from birth. The only thing that ever blocks us from seeing it or feeling it is thought in the moment. So, Irma can’t take my joy away or cause me to feel scared. Have I felt scared over this week, absolutely!! That’s a part of being human. We are going to have feelings, both high and low. But, I know 100% that my feelings are only responses to the ebb and flow of my thoughts.

Sometimes I don’t see it and I believe that my feelings are coming from something outside, other than thought. I mean it really feels that way sometimes. Ok, it’s a lot of times! Earlier this week I was so caught up in thought and running around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to find gas and water. My anxiety level was way high. I thought that the long lines, empty gas pumps, and shelves were making me feel scared and worried, or worse, telling me something about my future. But, it doesn’t work that way. Once I caught it and snapped back to reality, it was like unclogging a pipe and allowing me to hear from God and know what to do. Divine guidance is real and it’s for all of us.

When we go outside-in, we get caught up in our thoughts and think that our felt experience is being created from something other than thought. It’s going to happen all the time because we’re human. Understanding that frees us from taking our thoughts seriously and personally, and it frees us from living as a victim to our circumstances. We are totally supported by God. For me, that’s why I can carry everything to Him in prayer rather than bearing needless pain.

If you’d like to know more, or would like some support, email me and we’ll talk.

Love & blessings,

The Meaning of Our Thoughts

A couple of months ago I saw this picture by Brian Andreas in my Instagram feed (connect with me there if you haven’t already). When I first read this quote it immediately grabbed my attention and stopped me from scrolling on.

You see, I was having a bad day when I saw this. I was feeling down in the dumps about some things that were going on in my life. Things just weren’t going well. Everything just seemed really tough, and no matter what I tried, I couldn’t get out of the negative feelings I was experiencing. Seeing this post was the wake-up call that I needed in that moment. It clued me in on what I was doing – trying to make meaning of my thinking and control my thoughts. There is no need to do that!

Our thoughts are just that, thoughts. That’s all they are. Thoughts are totally neutral until we give them meaning. We don’t have to take them seriously, judge them, or give them meaning. Doing so only clogs our minds up even more. Thought is transitory by nature. When we don’t attach to a thought, it goes away on its own. Our experience is only created through thought. Understanding the thought-feeling connection is where our peace of mind comes from and helps us to struggle less in life.

Love & blessings,

Our Willing Participation

When I first read this, it stung. A LOT! Ouch! But, it’s so true. It seems a lot easier to look for blame elsewhere instead of taking responsibility for our own lives. I think it’s just a natural response to misunderstanding where our experience comes from. That’s all. When we think that our feelings are coming from something else other than thought, then we do stuff like blaming. We just do what we know best to do in the moment. Understanding that our human experience is only created through thought leads to more clarity and peace of mind.

Love & blessings,

Our Responsibility

Our tranquility, happiness, and peace of mind only come from within. How we experience life only comes from the energy of Thought. When we think that we are feeling something other than Thought, we are putting the responsibility for our experience on something or someone else. This then leads to wasting our time blaming and waiting for our happiness, success, and whatever else we want in our life, “to come.” A major part of our responsibility is understanding that life only works one way – from the inside out.

Love & blessings,

Honoring My Grandmother

The picture above is of my beloved grandmother and myself. She and I were “best, best girlfriends.” I can still hear her voice calling me that, and it warms my heart. I was blessed to live with my grandmother while I was growing up, and now, as an adult, I am still benefiting from her wisdom. I’m thinking about her even more this week because July 11th would have been my grandmother’s 101st birthday.

One of the things my grandmother would say to me a lot was, “You’re sitting on a million bucks and don’t even know it.” Those words have stuck with me for years. Unfortunately, I didn’t understand what she was trying to teach me until after her death. You see, it took me years, and many mistakes, to see for myself that I already had the ability and capability inside me to succeed at whatever I set my mind to. I believed my fears and negative thoughts. This stunted my relationship with myself and affected my relationships with others. Basically, I wasn’t living up to my God-given potential. My grandmother saw it, and thankfully I woke up to it as well.

I’m so grateful to her for her support. In essence, she was one of my first life coaches. And, best of all her, my personal growth is benefiting my children because it’s helping me to parent better. In honor of my grandmother’s birthday, I am offering a package of 3 coaching sessions for $101 for mothers of elementary, middle, or high school aged children who want some support in fulfilling their God-given potential so they can better be there for their children. I’d like to ask for your help in getting the word out. I’d love to help as many people as I can. Who do you know who is mom struggling to see her potential right now? Who do you know who’s stuck dealing with emotional, relationship, or job issues, feeling trapped and needing help figuring it out? I’m not asking for any contact information. I ask that you share this offer with whoever comes to mind for you and ask them to email me. The sign-up period for this offer is until July 31, 2017. Thank you!

Love & blessings,

Where does freedom really come from?

Today we celebrate our independence as a nation here in the United States. At the same time, so many of its citizens do not feel entirely free. Many people in this “land of the free” are persecuted and discriminated against for many reasons – skin color, gender, financial status, education level, sexual orientation, past mistakes, and more. We’re free, but not really free? That’s a misunderstanding for sure. So, where does freedom really come from? In order to clear up the misunderstanding on the outside, we have to start with clearing up the misunderstanding on the inside. We’re free not because of what people say or determine for us. And, neither do our physical circumstances determine our freedom. Our freedom comes from within.

Love & blessings,

My Kids and My Thoughts

I’ve had a lot on my mind lately, along with feeling overwhelmed and frustrated at times. School is out, so the kids are at home with me. Need I say more? My normal daily routine has changed. I still need to get done what I need to get done, but then there’s my kids’ requests (ok, my original word was demands) to play, and my quiet workspace has been overtaken by their laughter, loud arguments, and bouncing balls. Sometimes I feel like I just can’t get anything done. Can you relate to the struggle?

I could say more, but the most important thing I can say is that it’s all ok. Really? YES! I know that my feelings aren’t coming from my kids or from the changes to my routine and workspace. Sometimes I lose my bearings, and I just focus on the feelings of overwhelm and frustrations. Other times they don’t bother me as much. That’s just how life works. Our emotions normally go high and low. When we see that and that our experience (feelings) comes from thought, it frees us from trying to fix or control ourselves, others, or our circumstances.

We are connected to the Wisdom behind life. And, as Luke 1:37 tells us, “For nothing will be impossible with God.”‬ That’s a fact of life that helps me through it all. Whatever it is I need, whatever I need to get done, God is always there supporting and guiding. When I just go to Him, instead of letting my negative thoughts guide me, I get the answers that I need. But, we can block ourselves off from hearing Wisdom when we get caught up in our thinking, believing that our experience is coming from something other than thought.

Love & blessings,

Which Thoughts to Use?

“Each day in our life we have probably thousands and thousands of thoughts going through our head. Some are good. Some are bad. Some are positive. Some are negative. Now, this is where your free will comes in. You have the free will to use whichever thoughts you want to. That’s quite different. Now, if you have a bad thought, you don’t always act on it. It’d be a terrible life if everybody acted on their bad thoughts. You just ignore them, and you act on the good thoughts.” – Sydney Banks

Equipped By Design

Whatever situation or circumstance we face, we are equipped by design to handle it. The same Wisdom that’s behind life is within each and everyone of us, always speaking to us and guiding us. The only thing that blocks us from seeing it is thought.

We live in a thought generated reality, so what we think is what we see. Whenever we think we can’t handle something, that’s a made up illusion through thought. Fear, stress, worry, those are all made up too. Our feelings don’t come from anything outside of us. They come through thought. When we think that our experiences, our feelings, are being created from the outside-in, that is what trips us up.

Love & blessings,