Hello beautiful people!
A limiting belief is a thought that we become so attached to, we believe it as truth, we don’t see any other way of looking at it, and we think it’s who we are (we identify with it). The belief is limiting because then everything else that we do filters through that belief. “I can’t…” becomes a stop sign. “I am…” keeps us from trying. And, it goes on and on. Limiting beliefs can be so disguised that we totally miss them. Now, that I know that, I’ve been on the hunt for them in my life. If we are not intentional about noticing them, being aware of them, we will continue to stay stuck in them. Seeing our limiting beliefs is a first step for breaking free of them.
This week in my karate class I realized I didn’t have a clear mind when I was sparring. My mind was full of thoughts from being very hard on myself for not lifting my legs to block kicks and for using my hand to block instead. I just kept missing it kick after kick (and I have the bruises to prove it). This has been going on for months, since I first started sparring. Then I remembered to look for the limiting beliefs, and what did I see? “I can’t” and “I’m wrong”. They were wrecking my sparring flow!
I finally saw the gap between the beliefs and myself and that I didn’t have to believe them. Limiting beliefs are just thoughts, and thoughts have no meaning unless we give them meaning. I saw that I could change the meaning, so instead of seeing them as wrongs, they could be learning opportunities. I saw that I didn’t have to stay attached to those (or any) limiting beliefs. And, once I saw that, when I allowed myself to stop identifying myself, and my actions, as “can’t” and “wrong”, my head cleared up. I stopped thinking so much about sparring and what I was doing. Then I noticed that when my opponents tried to kick me, I was blocking with my leg. It just came more easily to me than it did before and a little more effortlessly. When our minds are clear, we’re more able to flow in our natural strengths and abilities. But, when our minds are cluttered with thoughts and limiting beliefs, our performance is hindered.
What limiting beliefs are holding you back? Would you like some support in letting go of them? If so, contact me and we’ll talk.
Love & blessings,
I spent so much time struggling with frustration, anger, stress, and overwhelmed, but getting this insight has made a major difference in my life. If you are dealing with the same thing and want to learn more, contact me and we’ll talk.
Hello everyone! February 14th is coming up soon, so I’m celebrating early by giving away 14 coaching sessions to women who want to improve their love lives (1 hour session per lady). For some, the thought of Valentine’s Day brings excitement and warmth. For others, it may be something to dread and void of any cozy feelings. What do you feel when you think of Valentine’s Day? Is it a day that you dread or a day that you want to be as special as possible? What do you want your love life to be like? I’m looking for 14 women who want to explore that question and make positive changes. No gimmicks or techniques that don’t last. No tips or to-do lists that produce no results. Scripture tells us that we can’t put new wine into old wineskins. So, this offer is for women who are ready to do the work they need to do on the old, so that they are ready to experience something new. The sessions will only be available until February 14, so reserve your spot now.
Love & blessings,
Hello everyone! Wow, we are halfway into January already! Stores have their Valentine’s Day decorations up already. Love is in the air! Maybe some posts on how to get the romantic relationship you want might be coming soon (send me any questions you have on finding love and relationships), but for now let’s look at your goals overall. I thought this would be a good time to check-in and see how you are doing with your goals/resolutions/intentions for 2017 so far. Are you were you want to be? What are your challenges so far?
If you didn’t set any goals, no worries. There’s no pressure or rule that says that you have to. There’s no “Goals Police” coming for you. But, in all seriousness, setting some goals can be very beneficial. I like to look at goal setting as just asking myself and answering the question:
“What do I want to achieve?”
Whether you have already set some goals or not, this might be a good time to reassess the goals you made or whether to set some or not. I love Benjamin Franklin’s quote: “By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” So, another way to look at goal setting is as preparation. You have to start somewhere. Setting goals is like getting the game started (I love to use metaphors if you haven’t noticed already). Whatever it is that you want for your life, how are you going to get it? Setting goals helps to answer that question.
- Are you afraid to take the first step or afraid that you won’t succeed in achieving your goals? These are normal feelings, and I have experienced them both. Here’s the thing: our feelings just give us feedback about our thoughts in the moment. That’s it. Our minds were created to think and our feelings are responses to our thoughts. Feelings are totally neutral until we give them meaning, and they can’t predict what’s going to happen in our future. Is it ok to feel what we feel? Yes! It’s normal and what we do as humans. Are our feelings useful? Yes, they absolutely are! Look at feeling afraid that you won’t succeed in meeting your goal – the feeling means nothing about you or even about how the goal will turn out for you. All that feeling means is that you are having some fearful thoughts about succeeding. That’s it. It’s like standing in the rain. You feel the rain, but you are not the rain just because you feel it.
- How come you set the goals that you set? Many times we set goals because of what we think they will do for us, like making us a better person, making us happy, or bringing us more love. But, all of that is an inside job. If the goals we set are to fill in the blank in sentences like these: “I’ll be happy when _____,” “I’ll feel ok when _____,” or “I need _____ to feel successful,” then we’re setting goals based on a misunderstanding of where our experience comes from. How we experience life only works one way: from the inside out. That’s why nothing has the power to make us feel any way. Nothing can make you a better person because you already are wonderful (check out Genesis 1:27). Nothing can bring us more happiness, love, or wellbeing because that’s already within us, God-given at birth. If we’re ever not feeling them, we don’t need to go searching for them. The discovery is in seeing what attachment to thought is blocking them. For example: You’re not going to feel love and wellbeing if you believe thoughts of unworthiness. You’re not going to feel successful if you act on thoughts of failure. When our minds are clear and not clouded with the misunderstanding of where our experience is coming from, then we are more free and open to hear wisdom/intuition and be guided from there.
If anything I shared resonates with you, or if you would like some support meeting your goals, then contact me or schedule a coaching conversation.
Love & blessings,
Ok, I still need a lot more practice with hand lettering. It hasn’t been that long since I started learning, and I truly believe that practice makes progress. My first thought was to not post this pic because I didn’t think it was worthy of showing. But, then I thought about how many times I shied away from something, spoke negatively about myself, or gave up on something because I felt like I wasn’t worthy enough. Can you relate too? But, what I know now is that the feeling of worthiness is just a response to my thought in the moment. That’s it! Our feelings are just feedback and responses to our thoughts. Nothing more and nothing less.
Worthiness is just a feeling & our feelings are just feedback on our thoughts.
Our feelings know nothing about who I am or what my future will be. It’s the same for you too! And, thoughts are just created because that’s what our minds do. We can choose to act on our thoughts (believe them) or let them pass. What would your life be like if you just let your thoughts pass through without attaching to them?
Love & blessings,
Your life is your story to create. We can’t control every situation we encounter in our lives, but how we experience them is an open book for us to write. There are no fixed/only one way experiences. Things are neutral until we give them meaning, our thoughts and feelings included. Our feelings come as responses to our thought in the moment. That’s all. Our feelings do not tell us anything about ourselves, our past, or our future. How could they?
Getting a deeper understanding of this has been one of the biggest blessings for me this year, especially as a wife and mother. Realizing that my feelings, though real and valid, are not fixed and are just stories my mind is creating in the moment was life changing. Our feelings only tell us about our thoughts in the moment. That’s the only way it works. That’s how things get meaning to us, through thought. I fall back into my thinking all the time, because as humans that’s what we do. But, I’m getting quicker at recognizing what’s going on, that I’m just feeling my thoughts in the moment. And, when I do it’s like an access point – freeing me from the noise of my thoughts so I can get a clearer mind and hear God’s wisdom. It’s helped me to be more present to my family, to connect more, to enjoy the present moment more, to judge myself and others less, to stop taking things personally, and enjoy life more. The stories I was telling myself, all the anger, whining, complaining, comparing, were doing nothing but blocking me from the truth – we all have innate love, wisdom, and wellbeing. It’s our birthright.
What stories are you telling yourself?
Love and blessings,
Are you feeling worthless? I admit, I feel like it sometimes too. When things don’t go right, when the way seems dark. But, there’s something you need to understand: You have great worth, even when you don’t feel like it.
Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Your worth is pre-existing, in you from day 1! Nothing can take it away. The truth is, when we feel worthless what’s really going on is that we are having a feeling. That’s it. Worthlessness is just a feeling, and when it goes away, when your mind clears up, then you’ll see what’s real – your great worth. It’s like when the clouds are in the sky, the sun is still there because it never goes away.
Love & blessings,
Halloween festivities are in full swing today! Along the line of the theme of ghosts, goblins, and fright, are you feeling haunted by your past? You don’t have to continue to be. The past only exists in our memories, and our memories are just thoughts.
Haunting feelings like guilt, regret, shame, and disappointment are not telling you anything about yourself or your future. Our feelings only tell us about what we are thinking about in the moment. That’s all they can do. They have no power over us.
Do you want to be free of your past? Stop focusing on it and giving it your attention! Just because you have thoughts about your past does not mean you have to focus on them or believe them. It just means your mind is doing what it was created to do – thinking!
Love & blessings,
The number 3, and the message that we have the power to change our story, has been coming up frequently for me lately, so I’m listening and putting them together.
Your turn-around-moment could come in 1 conversation, but what if you had 3? I have a big birthday coming up next month. It’s the big 3-9! For the last birthday in the decade of my 30’s, I am offering 3 women the opportunity to change their story with 3 one-to-one coaching sessions, within a 30-day period, for $390.
Who this offer is for:
- You want to see a positive change, or a turn-around-moment in your life, but you feel stuck
- You are motivated to achieve a goal or change your story, but you don’t know where to start
- You feel a lot of stress, anxiety, and worry, and it seems like it’s preventing you from feeling happy or achieving goals
- You want to know how to equip yourself to better handle low feelings, hard times, and difficult circumstances and situations
- You are truly serious about making the change you want for your life
Does this speak to you? Do you want to explore creating the change you want to see in your life through one-on-one coaching? If so, contact me and we’ll go from there.
Love & blessings,
We control what we do with our thoughts. Our thoughts don’t control us.
How are you using your thoughts? Understanding the thought-feeling connection is key. For every thought we have, it’s our responsibility to question it and decide if it’s a thought to (1) believe, (2) act on, or (3) just let pass away.
Love & blessings,